Holding Pattern

image from :  http://safeintheshadow.blogspot.com/2011/08/holding-pattern.html

holding pattern - a state of inaction with no progress and no change;

I was talking with my sister last night and I referenced the fact that life felt like it had been in a bit of a holding pattern because two years ago we had decided that Kristen's school was an important thing we really did want to do and that our other life choices, (behind God and family) was going to be subjugated to that priority.  I explained that I felt that we were coming out of that time because now we were asking ourselves..."What is next?".  Up to this semester, we had not needed to ask that question.  But now, we are 14 weeks away from Kristen's graduation and that question is actually looming very large for us.

As I spent a little time thinking about holding patterns though, I think it was only partially accurate.  Based on the definition that I pulled from a website up above, we definitely were not in a place in our life with no change or inactivity.  We were even making progress, however, it was really only visible in the kids ages and in Kristen's class number.  It could appear we had been in a holding pattern because we have been doing essentially the same thing for the last 2 years:  Kristen and the kids are in school, I am working and doing ministry and everything else is as we can fit it in.  

So, now with a mere 14 weeks left, things have an opportunity to change.  That is both scary and exciting.  

What is our bigger life goals and how does the next step fit into those plans?

Has God been using this time to prepare us for something particular?

How do we line up personal, professional, familial, financial and all  other goals together?

And so on...

When we had made the decision to do school, that set us on a direction and we really became very reactive in life to everything else.  Now, we have to become proactive, because reactive will no longer help us towards any goals...it will simply keep us in a true holding pattern.  So, to continue the analogy...we need to figure out which runway we are landing on, or if we are re-fueling in mid-air and which way we are going, quickly.  We have 14 weeks of "fuel" left and the pilot and co-pilot better figure this out real quick.

Answered Prayers

Kristen saw this number posted to her grade for last semester at about 3:30pm on Friday.  After anxiously awaiting the results since she took her final on Wednesday, the answer was finally here.  She had passed.  And again, it was by the smallest margin imaginable.  Just like in May, Kristen got exactly what she needed on the final to continue to the next section.  One could think that she just has a knack for it, but we know of the innumerable people that had been praying for Kristen specifically for this test over the course of the last 4 weeks and we attribute her success as being the combination of Kristen doing her part with the immense amount of prep work that she did, all the prayers of us, friends and family specific do this test and to God hearing those prayers and answering them.  

We have to mark this down now, much as what happened in May so that we can trace this journey back later. The improbability of how these last two semesters have played out have left us not only worn out physically, mentally and emotionally, but I think that both Kristen and I have had the opportunity to reflect on how we have felt God's presence and hand in these circumstances.

Isaiah 55:8-9(NIV)

⁸ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
   neither are your ways my ways,”
            declares the LORD.
⁹ “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
   and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Ultimately, I know that this can be misused, and misapplied....but it does at least speak to the fact that God is ultimately in control and that we get to partner in things when we do our part.  Kristen did and now she is one semester from graduating.  We both are looking forward to seeing where God is wanting her to be once she is graduated...you have to think that there is a special place that God has in mind for her and is making sure she gets to where he is going to be able to best use her for the glory of His kingdom.

Riddle me this, Batman?

Jude, Jaden and Jacob sporting their Brasil shirts - January 2012 

How is it that I never played soccer...don't watch soccer...in all reality, have no affinity for soccer whatsoever....live in America, and have only let each of my boys play one season of organized soccer each (I think...though Jaden may be at two)...and somehow, all three of my boys LOVE the BRAZIL soccer team and want to wear these shirts as often as possible?  I am at a loss.  (BTW, I am not at a complete loss...since I know Jaden's friend Alex loves soccer and that has influenced jaden...and of courese, Jaden influences his brothers...but, COME ON!!!!!) :)

Tin Tin

image from:  http://www.letintinmovie.com/

Took the boys to see this movie yesterday.  And a couple of things jumped out at me:

$50 to get me and 3 boys to a movie is ridiculous.  The boys are always going to be months behind the times if this is the case.  Ouch.

For a movie that is obviously directed towards families...especially kids, some of the content was rather adult oriented:

1. The secondary character spends a large majority of the movie drunk.  WOW.  Couldn't they come up with some other reason for his memory loss?  I have never read any of the Tin Tin books...so I assume they are trying to stay true to the story.  Bu since when does that EVER really happen in movies?  I really wish that they had Not made him drink and drink throughout the movie the way that they did.  Pretty soon you have kids stumbling around pretending they are drunk and thinking they are a jovial and lovable character too.
2. A surprising amount of death.  From battle scenes, to drowning and so on...there were a ton of deaths on screen.  While I can not say I remember seeing something particularly gory...though one scene I would say was a little too violent...there were still a large number of deaths that made everything seem casual about it...just retelling a story...

I suppose I am becoming an old curmudgeon...but even Jaden commented on how many deaths there were on screen...and it is one of those things that you have no way to know how it is impacting their little minds.

Jesus said, "The eye is the light of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. . . ." (Matt. 6:22-23)

See at last (LASIK!)

Don't let this picture spook you....but yes,  I am looking right at you :)

See at last, see at last, Thank God almighty, I can see at last!

As I am posting this on MLK day, I figured a quick shout out reference would be appropriate :)

I am a full two weeks distant from my previous world of wearing contact everyday to see.  That world was left behind, at least for the foreseeable future in light of a world of 20/20 vision simply by opening my eyes.  On December 29th for my right eye, and on January 2nd for my left eye, I underwent the LASIK procedure to correct my nearsightedness and the slight astigmatism that plagued me since I was young.

I know that I couldn't really say this was a wise financial move because of the cost, there is definitely no ROI in it.  It is a nice life improvement which I am enjoying though.  If it had not been for the money we had set aside for Kristen's shoulder that was in a use it or lose it Flexible Spending Account for 2011, I would not have done it.  Now that it is done, there is no looking back (pun intended).

Thanks to my family who had to deal with some painful logistics issues over those few days.

A week of frustration

To say that this week was frustrating would be putting it mildly.  I am running the line of complaining / documenting for posterity, but, to put it frankly, it sucked.  If it was an isolated occurrence, it would be one thing...but this seems to be a pattern.  And, as much as my frustration is with work itself, it is with me also, because I have let it get here.  I have not called out the excessive nature of the hours I am working....assuming that people will recognize and correct it.  I have assumed that it would be appreciated more so than the simple "atta boy" and heightening of the bar for the future.  And to be perfectly honest, it is a complete lack of recognition on my part that I have been going this way for YEARS.

Well, while the fear in me cries out and the hackles raise because I am raising the issue rather than just knuckling under and persevering...I have brought it up with people and it will be interesting to see how that shakes things up at work over the next few weeks.  I hope that it is only positive...but, not sure that it will be.  I am praying that God will guide my words, actions and decisions over the next several months as this comes to a head.

Failblog worthy from our hike?

Just a fun memento from our hike last Saturday.

Jaden's Room

We spent a bunch of time re-doing Jaden's room last week.  We got a whole bunch of stuff out of the closet that had been leftover from it being my office and made it organized so that he could use it effectively.  I think it really looks great now.  The real question is will it stay like this for very long ;) ?

Saturday hike

January 7th is not a date you would be expecting it to be 50+ degrees outside and to see people walking through Upton State Forest in t-shirts...but that was what we had.  

So, we were invited by the Crosby family on a hike and I took the boys and gave mom some peace and quite and we went on a 2 hour hike.

The boys loved running around, climbing on the rocks and generally being outside.  Jacob, as usual tended towards the fearless and Jaden was slightly more cautious but also more aware of what other's exoected of him too.

Trying to keep track of all the little ones definitely kept Bruce and I on our toes the whole way around the loop.  Here, he got to hang on to Jude while I was down in a ravine area helping the others do some climbing.

It was an interesting juxtaposition in some areas with the temperatures being what they were to see the pond frozen over and to see ice in many of the little rivulets.  It was hard keeping them from getting on the ice, knowing it would not support them....so instead they spent inordinate amounts of time trying to break it.

When they succeeded, they were giving each other large blocks that they then carried around and essentially sucked on as "river ice popsicles" for a good portion of our walk back.

Jude really loved having some amount of freedom.  He made it most of the way around, though he did spend a good amount of time on Dad's shoulders too.

Chronicling the boys growth...

Kristen got the boys' school pictures right before break.  It is amazing to look at them and see how much they have grown up.  Both of the boys look so much older.  So, I wanted to share the pics so everyone else can be amazed as well.

Jacob wit a cute grin

Jaden looking very GQ

Jude, our toothless wonder!

New Year, New Start...again

http://www.psdmate.com/2011/12/30/happy-new-year-2012/

Blog posting has gone down considerably over the last two years, and I am not happy about it.  It made it difficult to do my Christmas letter (which this year is about to go out as a new year's letter :) ), and with my memory what it is, I know I am forgetting things that I would be happy to look back on in the future.  I am going to work on this again and try to make a minimum of 1 or two entries per week so that I can chronicle our year.  So, Happy New Year to everyone who would read this and I will be catching up with you more as we go.