Night Terrors

I am not sure what you think of when terror comes to mind, but for Kristen and I over the last year+, I think the first thing that comes to mind is "Night Terrors".

"A night terror, sleep terror or pavor nocturnus is a parasomnia disorder, causing feelings of terror or dread, and typically occurring in the first few hours of sleep during stage 3 or 4 non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep" - wikipedia

A very clinical type definition, but it is something else entirely to live through.  This is not to be confused with a nightmare...it is a very different animal and if you have never experienced it, you most likely will not understand the true dread that we have experienced the numerous times this has happened with Jude over the last year.

For us, we have seen when Jude is especially tired, and generally when he in on a particular medication, these episodes can happen.  He will appear to wake up in a cold sweat, trembling and frightened...always calling out for Mom or Dad to help him.  We of course wake up and rush to him, but are very much helpless to do much but hold him until it passes and there are few things I have experienced that are quite so humbling, scary and that can make you feel quite as powerless as watching a child experience pain, terror, or any other thing...to be there in that moment with them and yet still have no ability to comfort, to make the experience better or to lessen the dread and terror that they are experiencing.  It has brought Kristen and I to tears as we have sat with him.

We are incredibly fortunate that he doesn't remember the episodes in the morning but we are always tired from lack of sleep and generally worn out as our nerves are frayed and our emotional tanks are dry.  On one hand, these episodes remind us how little control we truly have and how thankful we are to have our faith that can carry us through, but on the other hand, I rail against having us go through it at all.  I do pray that we are able to find a way to manage his hives and keep him from experiencing these episodes from the medication.